Life's Most Embarrassing Moments

We have all had them, the most embarrassing moment in your life? I can't be alone in this, right? Tonight was the night, 34 years old and I was reduced to tears at the local Safeway store. As I type this I'm thinking do I want to put this out to the whole world? My embarrassment, my humiliation? I do and I don't, I will because I'm so fricken mad.

So it goes like this. I pick up my DH from work and we stop at a few stores on the way home, the last stop being Safeway (our local grocery store) we always try and do a shop as they have what's called 10% Tuesday once a month and you get 10% off your bill. So we trooped on into the store with the girls and started to shop. We worked our way from one end to the next filling up the cart, after awhile I kept seeing the same security guard pop up in the same locations we were. I never really thought much of it. We were going thru the check out and sure enough there he was, kinda standing behind the bagger putting stuff in our cart.

So we're done and are walking out of the store and I say to Bruce "did you get the feeling the security guard was following us??" Bruce goes "you felt that too?" We get to the van and open the trunk to load and look and see the security guard and the cashier we had heading toward us. They then say to me we need you to come back into the store, I'm like ok. So as we're walking I say to the guard "do I need my receipt?" He says "that's a good idea". I then say "well what is this about", he says we'll discuss it in the store.

So we get in there and the cashier is standing by the door with another employee who is putting some stuff away(I later find out is the store manager). The cashier then says to me "a customer told us she saw you put something in your purse".

I'm sure my draw dropped. I kinda sputtered "What, What did I supposedly stuff in my purse??" Well we don't know, she just saw you put something in your purse.

So I opened up my purse and pulled out my wallets and said "ok here is what was in my purse!!!" and showed all 3 of them. You know the sponge bob squarepants gummies, the no-name zoo animal gummies, the little bottle of hand lotion, the pen, the plastic bag of diaper wipes I carry and there were a few instant teller receipts.

They all kinda looked at each other and me and I said again "so what did I supposedly stick in my purse?" No one had an answer and I showed them all again what was in there.

The manager kinda mumbled "well I guess there is really nothing we can do". I stuffed my wallets back in my purse and by this time I start to cry. The security guard kinda mumble some sort of an apology but honestly at that point I didn't really hear much. So I left the store.

I go back to the van and Bruce is there with the girls and I tell him thru my tears what has happened. I get into the van and he says do you want me to go back in??

Well a man walks up to the van and says are you the woman from inside just now?? Bruce is like yes. The man says just so you know if you need a witness I will give you my name and number cause what they just did to your wife in there was fucking bullshit (sorry for that). He went on to say that how they handled it was wrong and if there was a problem they should have taken me in private to confront me and that they shouldn't have had me empty my purse in front of the public that was there to witness it all. He was plainly disgusted. He left his information for us and left us with the parting words, if Safeway doesn't do something get a lawyer that was just wrong.

So of course now Bruce is mad as he didn't see what happened inside the store. So he goes back in and says to the security guard/store manager that he was pissed at how they had just humiliated his wife in front of all these people, accusing her of shoplifting with no proof. He got the managers name, the security guard wouldn't give his name (he denied following us through the store). We have a call into the district manager and we'll see where it goes from there.

I could have died. I'll never shop there again. Then I get pissed of and think you fucking assholes, do you really think I would shoplift with my kids and husband in tow?? What did they think it was a shoplifting lesson for my kids! Do they think that of the $170 worth of stuff we had in out cart that I needed to shove shit into my purse?? Are you fucking kidding me???? I normally don't swear on my blog but I'm really fucking mad, well now that I've calmed down.

Honest people I"M NOT A THIEF.

Well I will admit to stealing my husbands heart, but I have to throw that corny line in so you all won't think I'm total trash with my potty mouth.